This morning during my meditation God and I had this conversation:
~ God, what is my greatest challenge in building a coaching practice?
{note: this question was inspired by Cheri Huber in my daily read of Making a Change for Good A Guide to Compassionate Self-Discipline}
~ Not believing in yourself.
~ But, why? Why don’t I believe in myself? When I do what I do, I do it well. And when I see others do what I do, I feel I can do it better. Why don’t I have a solid sense of confidence? Oh my! I just revealed that I believe there’s a “once and for all” cure to insecurity!
~ It does not work that way.
~ I know! So why am I hitting my head against the wall?
~ Because it feels good to at least a part of you.
~ But, why? Oh my goodness, because I can control it! I can control ramming my head against the wall. But, I can’t control whether or not someone hires me. This owning your own business thing is like a perpetual, never-ending job interview!
~ It’s always about giving up control for you. The more you let go, the more success you will enjoy. Let go of perfectionism and be yourself. You are talented and here to serve a big purpose. The world needs you. Families need you.
~ Okay, God. I open myself up to receive your strength. I am willing to let go of trying to control the process. I am willing to put myself out there because I know you will never reject and abandon me no matter what happens. I trust you will not lead me to failure. In fact, in my head I already know that your intention is to lead all of us to success, deep fulfillment, and loving relationships. It is time for me to practice all of this in my heart. Thank you for infusing me with compassion, understanding, and inspiration this morning. I love you!
most mornings i wake up and feel good, im in a great relationship we get along perfect untill my insecurity comes to play. i have no idea how to control my feelings of dissatisfaction with my body, i constantly have an overwhelming feeling that my boyfriend is always looking at other girls and i constantly compare myself to everyone. i know i am a beautiful women i reconize that but when there are other beautiful women around i feel so small and helpless. for many years and even now ive struggled with my weight ive had eating disorders, and as a direct result of that i know thats where much of my insecurities come from. but i dont know how to fix any of it im destroying my relationship with the man i love more than anything, im constantly looking for approvel from other people and even attention, i just feel lost i dont know what to do anymore. my heart is breaking and my great relationship is breaking with it.